


Home is Where You Are

by nisargasinha



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, M/M, Post-Second War with Voldemort, married wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-05 09:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18826090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nisargasinha/pseuds/nisargasinha
Summary: They come home.





	Home is Where You Are

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first Wolfstar fic I'm posting on AO3. Hope you enjoy.

The sound of rain pattering on his windowsill, and a breeze ruffling the yew tree near his window, sync with his baffled pain. Remus sighs. The night is cold and distant and he can't sleep, of course. Remus Lupin and insomnia, a love story that can give himself and Sirius a run for money. 

 

Sirius. 

 

It's been almost two days since Sirius left their flat. It's been almost two days since Lily called him and asked,  _ "Sirius is here Remus. Are you guys okay? Are you okay?" _

 

_ Remus sighed, "Yeah Lily, I'm okay. How's he?"  _

 

_ "He doesn't look quite good, you know. Refused to eat anything. James had to force him."  _

 

_ "What's he doing?" _

 

_ "Staring at the ceiling", Lily lowers her voice, "Don't worry, Remus. We'll take care of him." _

 

_ "I know Lils."  _

  
  
  


The radio is playing since the day Sirius left. A heated argument, shouts, the radio, finally the bang of their front door and Sirius is gone. Remus recalls how stupid he felt standing frozen at the middle of their living room and "Love of my life" playing in the background, from their bedroom. Quite ironic, yeah. But then, what in Remus Lupin's life is not ironic or a twist of crooked laughter of fate? War-torn veterans, that's what they are. Werewolf. DADA professor of Hogwarts. A charity case, of course. Drowning himself into the quietness of pain and the rain pouring outside his window, a bed without Sirius, self-pitying sounds good as for now, Remus thinks. 

 

It hurts. Everything hurts. It's been some three years since they won the War. Years of misunderstanding, pain, misery ended, maybe. They don't wake up at the middle of the night fearing a sudden attack, gripping their wands tightly anymore. The right side of the bed doesn't seem cold and alone because one of them is away for some Order business. 

 

Except it completely does. Because Sirius has left and he can't sleep. The pain in his chest feels like the heavy clouds that couldn't rain. 

 

Remus gets up and walks over the piles of books, the bottles of whiskey, numerous filters of half-burnt cigarettes, and mugs of his occasional coffee breaks around, stands by the window only to light up another cigarette. It's still raining. The homeless man, is running away from the bench of the tiny park in front of their flat, to find a shelter under the shade of the bookshop at the sidewalk. Remus breathes deeply. The smell of rain & pine, always remind him of Sirius, their boyhood at Hogwarts and the way they have always been with each other. He is in love with a boy he knew some twenty years back. He is in love with the man whom he married three years ago, who left him two days back. "Stupid pathetic fallacy!", he mentally groans, throwing away the half-burnt cigarette from the slightly open window of their room, only to stop the tears that are threatening to trickle down. 

 

He has never been okay with Sirius being away. 

 

\------------------------------------------------------------

 

It's been four days and fifteen hours and Sirius is still not home. It's fifteen texts and three calls unanswered and Sirius isn't home. 

 

Everything reminds him of Sirius and he can't breathe. 

 

Remus grabs his worn out coat and walks down snowy London streets. It's always been his coping mechanism, walking with the snow, all alone, when everyone hurries to go home. He has nowhere to go. No Sirius. No home. 

 

At least the wind slapping on his cheeks and nose hurts less. At least it numbs the pain of missing Sirius, being windswept, frost bitten. 

 

\------------------------------------------------------------

 

He goes back to flat. It suddenly sucks the breath out of his lungs, thinking Sirius won't come here to find him. Drowning himself in misery and chugging Ogden's strongest Firewhiskey isn't helping him numbing the pain either. The pain and the desire of numbing it, interlaced, remind him of Sirius even more, their quiet flat, the radio relentlessly playing, the telly murmuring in the background, Sirius' side of bed, his Pink Floyd t-shirt, everything screams  _ Sirius  _ here, everything screams their togetherness, domesticity. He runs his finger absentmindedly on the rim of Sirius' favourite coffee mug, Canis Major printed on it, memories flashing by,  _ " Of all things, you have to buy this mug, Sirius?", he laughs.  _

 

_ "Aw come on Moons, praise your beautiful husband and his personalized coffee mug. They made it for me! I'm everywhere, see! The brightest star, after all."  _

 

_ "A narcissistic prat, that's what you are.", Remus snorts, playfully punching Sirius' arm.  _

 

_ "Oi! That's not fair babe!" _

 

Remus smiles fondly, tasting the tears on his lips, breaking like a dam that couldn't hold itself anymore. He wipes his cheeks feverishly, only to notice the cigarette, sitting idly in between his fingers, has burnt and he hasn't taken a single drag. 

 

_ Coping mechanism.  _

 

Remus stands up, and stands in front of the window, fresh tears forming in his eyes, once again, everything outside the window blurring with the tears, smudging the difference between time and space, losing himself over and over again. 

 

His trance breaks with the ringing of his phone. 

 

_ Sirius.  _

 

His heart stops. Time freezes. A rush of anxiety and relief simultaneously flood his consciousness, and tremblingly, he receives the call, silently wishing the whining pessimism in his brain really stops, at least for now. 

 

_ "Hello?", his voice trembles, reflecting his own nervousness.  _

 

_ A long pause. Remus waits in bated breath. Maybe Sirius misses him. Maybe he doesn't.  _

 

_ "Moons?", Sirius' voice sounds so feeble,  _ _ distant , like he hasn't slept for the time he was away from Remus, yet so home. Remus lets go the breath he didn't realize holding, in three days and some hours that almost felt like a painful eternity.  _

 

_ "Moons, I'm so sorr--"  _

 

_ "Come home, babe, please?", he pleads.  _

 

_ "Y.. Yes. I am coming."  _

 

\---------------------------------------------------------

 

Fifteen minutes later, Sirius is in front of him, at the middle of their living room, where he left Remus four days back. Arms wrapped around Sirius' waist, Sirius hiding his face in the crook of Remus' neck, crying, crying, an overwhelming feeling of Sirius' tears wetting his t-shirt, the saline tears on his lips and Sirius' messy hair, it all feels so surreal. 

 

"You're here, you're here.", Remus feverishly repeats, like his life depends on it, with a hint of surprise, and a deluge of relief and love. 

 

"I'm here Remus, I'm home, I'm home.", Sirius cries, like Remus' arms around him is breathing him back to life. 

 

They stand there, embracing each other. Time blurs once again. 

 

"Remus?", Sirius looks at him. 

 

"Hmm?" 

 

"Are you mad at me?" 

 

Remus softly laughs, "I'm always mad at you Padfoot." 

 

Sirius smiles, "But you love me." 

 

"Yes, I do." 

 

"I love you too babe." 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Reviews are love :)


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